Do They Know It's Christmas?

Why does it seem like everything has to happen all at once?

I mean, it's Christmas time and I'm practically assigned to layout 8 pages in 7 days. (I'm sure if the person assigning the work knew those terms, she'd use them.) Which isn't really a problem. I love doing that work and get some strange adrenaline rush that is somehow calming when I'm reading through articles and figuring out where to put them on the page. It's like rearranging furniture, but without all the heavy lifting. So, taken on it's own, I'd hardly consider it a task for myself.

But then there's a couple of friends of mine at church who are living together but not getting along. And making the whole thing quite public and rather dramatic. I'd like to help, and I'm doing what I can, but they're both rather immature, especially considering their age. Add in that one's rather stubborn and self-centered while the other doesn't know how to take care of herself and it becomes rather stressful. This would be quite tolerable and I might actually be up for the challenge of helping the one find a job and an apartment and listening to the other gripe were the former making better-guided efforts and the latter making better-founded complaints.

And who doesn't love when other people's drama becomes their drama? My sister's best friend is having major boyfriend issues. As in, the deadbeat came home drunk, told her he was entering the military despite having talked about it with her. So she punched him in the junk and he back handed her, bruising and swelling up her face. So she threw a bottle of Grey Goose and he called the cops, the end result being her in jail. And she, of course, went back to him. So my sister's been stressed out about it, which is making life with her difficult.

Plus there's little things like the awkwardness of our passenger to church. Or the 15 different kids I had to step over while carrying plates with bowls of soup. Or that person who insists on going 10 mph under the speed limit. For 6 blocks. When you're running a little bit late.

But the most stressful thing of all...
is probably the issue that's the hardest to explain. I'll try without giving so much (rather personal) history that makes you regret reading my blog.

It all started when...I made my very first friend in Omaha. Well, the first person I met after moving to Omaha who I would even consider considering a friend. He and I worked together just about every Friday and Saturday night (I could probably list the exceptions) from September 2007 through the end of the following May. We got along famously, and I'm not making that up. I was called upon on more than one occasion to work with him and calm him down. New managers knew before working with us that he and I would get things done.

We opened up a lot to each other. Quite often, I would refer to the times it would be just the two of us in our area as our therapy sessions. I kind of miss those sometimes. His being in my life changed it. It opened my eyes to all sorts of truths as well as plenty of lies. I know that he opened up to me in ways he had never opened up to other people he considered his friends, as I did him.

There were some things that I realized about him and about our relationship fairly early on. I knew that he would get along well with my sister. I would even tease him that I'd bring her out here just to meet him. I wanted to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ with him. I wanted him to know of the love that Jesus Christ has for my friend, for all my friends, but especially him. I knew that he needed to know that. I also knew that he refused to believe it, based on whatever experiences he had in his life.

Fast forward to a time where my sister needed to be out here to get help and support she couldn't get where she was before. I was hesitant to let her work with me and this friend(who came back after some time away). But I relented and got her hired. They've become close. Closer than he and I ever were. She has been able to share messages with him that I would never be able to because of who we all are.

My first Omahonian friend wants to be in a romantic relationship with my sister. But he can't give her the kind of relationship she is looking for. Although I put it in these terms, she has agreed with me: She is looking for a man who will accept both the Gospel and her past. She has acknowledged that it will be rather difficult and she has accepted the fact that maybe she over-mashed the potatoes and it won't happen in this life.

Tonight, things fell heavy. He left his phone with whoever he was with earlier in the night. Someone who considers themselves a good friend of his. I have suspicions as to who the person was, and I suspect it to be female. She said some things that upset my sister, who left to go on a walk. As soon as my sister left, I texted my friend's number, asking what they said to her. Throughout the entire conversation, this friend of my friend's refused to tell me who she was. I asked her why she was using his phone, if he knew, would he approve, etc. She refused to give me any solid reasons, saying she was curious about things, that she wanted to find out what he wouldn't tell her. All while asking me not to tell him what was going on.

I don't have unlimited texting, so after one of her pleas, I said I would tell him "If I find it necessary. Your refusal to accept responsibility for your actions are leading me to think I should. You have 3 texts to explain yourself."

"He is out and I was curious. Why three and not one?"

As I was typing this reply, my sister called me and asked what I was doing. I'm not stupid; the friend of our friend's had asked my sister who I was. "Because you still haven't told me your name, what you said to Kim or, now, what you were curious about, why you were curious, and why you told on me."

"Can you not tell **$^&@ I was on his phone?" Way to waste a text, girlie.

The last text I sent was this: What makes you think you're entitled to know things that **$^&@ doesn't want to tell you? One last text to out yourself or I'll feel obligated to tell him."

"**$^&@ is tired and sick. I do not want him to be hurt. I am protective of him like you are to your sister."

Sorry, sweetie, play again. Yes, I am rather protective of my sister. And, yes, I sometimes would like to know the content of her conversations. But I care about her enough to not go behind her back to get that information. If she doesn't want to tell me, I'm not going to push her. And I'm rather protective (if that's the word she wants to use) of our friend's feelings. He needs to know that she used his phone. But I'm going to make her tell the story, hoping that he'll make the effort to confirm the story. She needs to answer for what she has done. He needs to know what kind of friend she is. He can decide for himself whether or not that's the kind of friend he wants to have.

And, yes, it's because some of the things she said made my sister cry. And I know how hurt he would be if he found out I hadn't told him. I made that mistake before, and told him I wouldn't make it again.