Truth Be Told...

I know I've gotten some accolades for my lighter posts, but I like the deeper ones, too. And it's my blog. So there.

In talking with a friend, I found myself saying I was more concerned with a third party knowing the truth than said party liking me. I think I may have come off as a little abrasive when I said that. I thought this passion for truth was something new. I've been trying to make 2011 the Year of Full (Appropriate) Disclosure.

In walking over 6.5 miles after the talk, I recalled an incident from when I was 14 that made me realize this isn't new.

BF said, "Can you keep a secret?"
"Yeah."
"If I tell you, you have to promise not to tell anyone."
"Ok."
[Insert story of BF being molested.]

I had seen enough Law & Order: SVU to know I couldn't let that continue. But I had promised my friend to not tell anyone. I struggled for a couple of months before deciding I had to tell someone about it. I ended up going to my guidance counselor at school. BF didn't go to the same school I did, but I knew my guidance counselor would be able to talk to the right person in the right way. (Just as I knew the friend I talked to in the intro would be able to talk to the right person in the right way.)

Still, I was terrified of losing my friend's trust. I asked BF's brother to go with me; he and I happened to have the same guidance counselor, so it's not like he's going to some stranger. He and I were friends. It was his sibling.

He refused.

Which actually made me more determined to go. What was happening to BF was wrong, and I knew it. Now, BF's brother knew it and so did the person who was standing next to me when BF told me. But neither of them seemed to be moved to action. Sure, they weren't happy about it, but they were turning a blind eye to the injustice. Someone needed enough Uff-Da to tell some sort of authority figure about this.

That left me.

So I did. Went to my guidance counselor, told him rather matter-of-factly, answered his quesitons and left the office, only to go back for class scheduling. (Or as an office aide in later years.)

The truth became known and it ended up leading to a divorce for the person who molested BF. Sometimes I would feel somewhat responsible for that. If I hadn't told, no one would have and the molester's spouse wouldn't have filed. That marriage wouldn't have been ripped apart, and maybe the children of that marriage wouldn't have gone as far off the deep end as they did.

But then I came to realize the truth of the quote "All it takes for evil to exist in this world is for good men to sit back and do nothing." And that it wasn't my fault.

Never since have I made a blind promise.